You know how everyone have days they feel kind of down? I think I'm having one of those days guys. Not exactly feeling down, I was just lying on my bed and thinking back on the past few years of my life. Did a little reflection and I think it's really healthy to do this every once in awhile.
Aside from this blog, I do keep a hand-written diary and as I look back through the pages, I thank god that I kept all those memories. It's kind of funny too when I see the entries I made 4 years ago (age 16-17). I had such a different mindset that some lines I wrote just made me go like "Huh? Really.....". It's kind of embarrassing too so I guess I'm never gonna show it to anyone until I die.
So what has been in my mind is just about this thing between people: friendship & love. And before I go on and on, let me just emphasize that this is all MY opinion and this post is not directed at anyone. Peace!
A little off topic, this is something I just want to rant about hahaha. RANT START - I've thought about this for a few times now but I never understood these advises that I've heard from others. To me, friendship and love are very different kind of feelings. I think that sometimes people perceive them in a different way than me. For example, in a situation with a conflict between The Partner and The Best friend. This was the advise I've heard from others:
'You can always find another partner after you break up, it's okay. You should choose your friend because you've been with her for many years & she has always got your back'
My question is... friends leave too right? I think sometimes people forget that friends are people who are potential leavers too, just like lovers. - END OF RANT
Anyways, I'm pretty sure everyone (or maybe most people) would have experienced rejection or people leaving in their lives. Maybe it was someone you fancied OR a friend you've known for years. Sometimes the bonds that have been forged over years can be destroyed/torn apart by very simple things.
Knowing someone for a long period of time does not mean that you are close
Meeting and hanging out with someone almost everyday does not mean you are best friends
Even if you are super close to a friend, the relationship may just drift apart by maybe distance or busy schedules. Needless to say, people do change overtime as well. Change is something we have to face whether we like it or not.
I think an important thing for a relationship to work would be the effort each party is willing to put in to maintain the bond between them. Even if two of them are at 2 different places of the world, if they each put in the effort to contact the other, it is more likely that they won't drift apart right? Or maybe when they get into a fight, both take the initiative to come together to work things out. This actually can be summarized by my favorite quote of all time:
IT TAKES TWO HANDS TO CLAP
Of course there may be thousands of reasons and causes that can tear apart relationships. Be it attitude, environment or the person changed etc. Sometimes, there is really nothing we can do but watch the person we care about leave. Maybe they gave up.
But I think it is important for people to remember:
Not everyone stays,
People do pack up and leave without even turning back once
I don't pretend to know what people are thinking.
But I do know how it feels.
I've been through hurtful shit too.
My best and easiest solution:
JUST ACCEPT THAT BOTH OF YOU ARE DIFFERENT
Don't forget that 'every minute you spend with someone gives them a part of your life and takes part of theirs' (Ally Condie, Matched). Life goes on. Its hard but making things hard for yourself is not going to change anything.
Whoooooooop. But when you finally get yourself out of that relationship, never forget about those who have been there for you. Don't dwell too much on what you have lost, remember to turn your head around and see who is still there and BE GLAD & APPRECIATIVE.
Oh my gosh, as I read back on what I have written for this post, I feel that it's kinda filled with negativity. Hahah.
Honestly, I felt really relieved that I have grown so much from that girl from 4 years ago in my diary. Not that I dislike/hate her (I'm actually glad she was so funny), I feel that I have become more responsible and mature. I learnt to appreciate the bad times that I have overcome because without those, I wouldn't have grown stronger and be who I am today. I now take rejection more readily and it doesn't take me down, I try to turn it around and make myself better.
Remember,
"Regrets and mistakes, they're memories made"
- Adele (Someone Like You)
So leave memories as memories and move forward
Maybe something better will come your way after you have lost something precious
It's not the end of the world yet There's tomorrow coming after today
Besides letting me scribble out all my thoughts on this space, I do hope that you understand and can relate to what I have written. Focus on the good things rather than negativity. Remember, you have to brave the rain before you can see a rainbow :)
